[ Why, indeed? It hurts a little, thinking back to her own Shadow, of all the things she said and all the things she did, how shaken her Shadow was after what happened with Terry and how she'd dug her heels in twice as hard, convinced twice over not to let anybody get close because it hurts so much more to be turned on by somebody you love, compared to a stranger. ]

...I was scared of being alone. My Shadow tried so hard to keep me safe so I wouldn't die anymore, so I wouldn't have to go through the grief of losing my friends and family anymore. But more than anything, I was scared of being alone. I didn't want to give anybody any more chances, because I knew I would be let down in the end, but... Akira and Sasuke came, and asked for another chance. They couldn't guarantee anything. It's impossible to guarantee anything. I gave them another chance and took a leap of faith because...

[ Because she's stupid. Even after everything that's happened, being shoved to the ground again and again and again, no matter how many times she's let down, she still clings to something as unreliable as hope. ]

I can't stand being alone. I never want to be left alone. I'd rather suffer with the people I love, than be happy all on my own.