ten-faced, cetana version.

[overstrain]

I - 11/17: early morning, torii dimension (locked to Sasuke)

[ Terry had been a zombie for several days, and in complete stasis, despite the numerous wounds he was bleeding from that have never healed. It doesn't look like he's been bleeding while here though and he finally opens his eyes for the first time in days. ]

Where am I...?


II - 11/17: afternoon to evening, town

[ Terry lost all his memories. Good thing he and Orien met up. Maybe Sasuke also relayed the basics to him too. Either way, Orien got him a fresh set of clothes after Terry cleaned himself in the bathhouse. He's no longer a bloody mess. Orien is being a good tour guide and telling Terry where everything is, what he did, etc. Orien is treating this like Terry has been leading a normal life here. Don't fuck it up. He has glasses on too, since Orien brought that over as well. ]


III - 11/18: morning, torii (locked to Sasuke)

[ Terry regains all his memories. Everything. It takes so much not to lash out and he's started to feel desperate after experiencing the events on the 17th. He hides in the forest and revisits the torii. Please let him in. ]


IV - 11/19: lockdown, fear floor (limited to 2 people)

[ It's a ruined city. If you've seen Terry's memory floor previously, you'll see that it's the same city as before. However, there is no ongoing destruction. Everything has already happened. You'll see three people: Terrence, who stands at a distance from the other two, Terry who seems shell-shocked by something, and... another Terry? It's Shadow Terry, making a reappearance, grabbing a hold of Terry's collar and yelling at him.

It's a mess already. There's a reason this is the fear floor. ]


V - 11/23-25: black cat house, around town

[ A) Black cat house: There is a big, fluffy samoyed dog in the crane room that's looking down at the 30+ cats and petting them with his paw.

B) Around town: And now there's a big fluffy samoyed dog prancing around town that's petting cats again. Some cats have mixed responses to the petting. If he sees you, he'll give a short howl before staring at you. His omamori is completely hidden in his poofy fur, but if you dig through his fur, you'll see a glimpse or the usual red-brown that peeks through all the white. It's like a collar with a name tag... without the name. ]


VI - 11/28-29: around... town

[ Terry woke up inside Toki's body and he is having such a bad time. You can most likely find him lying down on the ground somewhere in town for one of many reasons. ]


wildcard

[ The following is a summary of what's happening to Terry:

11/17: complete mem loss
11/18: semi mem loss
11/19-22: shadow terry
11/23-25: samoyed terry, lose sense of direction
11/23-27: petting cats
11/28-29: switch bodies with toki

For any questions or anything else, contact me by PM or celenza ! ]

Comments

[overstrain]

Whatever you want to say. Adults can be terrible at speaking anyway.

[ He doesn't understand the whole "talking about things like an adult", because adults are just as bad. But that's not the point. ]

Anyway, my host is in time out because he'll go insane and destroy everything if I don't take control. Therefore, while he tries to get over it with his memories intact, I'm gathering a word or two from his friends in an attempt to convince him that the world is still worth something and running away is a shitty solution. You can say all the mushy stuff you want, or you can criticize him for all the stupid things he's done. I don't care as long as he listens.

[infiltrationtools]

Okay, talking about things how an adult should talk about them, then.

[Akira can't object to that because the Shadow is absolutely right.]

[However the second part of the Shadow's statement takes him a bit by surprise. Partly because he reached the same conclusion with regards to Terry wanting to nuke the planet because he's lost faith in them, partially because his Shadow is actually being nice and responsible, and partially because he asks himself similar questions about why the world is still worth something on a regular basis.]

...That's... very nice of you. Thank you.

Which means Terry is starting to actively supress his compassion and sensibility, since they came into you, right?

[overstrain]

[ The Shadow blinks while looking at Akira. He thinks Terry still has a sliver of compassion, because he wouldn't have locked away his memories otherwise, so that Hirajiro wouldn't be blown into pieces while he still had some rationality left. It was the Shadow who hated that: Terry was running away again when they agreed not to, and it was the Shadow that forced those memories back, in which forced Terry in timeout like some feral, uncontrollable child. He needed to learn how to face them.

... So that's really depending on the viewpoint on whether the Shadow seems "nicer". He personally doesn't think he's all that different from last time because some of it was an act. ]

He also threw away hope. He lost hope in everything and started hating himself after being constantly rejected back home, leaving the planet there to rot too. A lot happened for him in those years, even though it's only been a month for you since you saw me. He wants to die and I can't have that.

P5 SPOILERS beyond this point

[infiltrationtools]

["Should you wish it, I could return the world to its prior state -- one rampant with distorted masses. ...What say you?"]

[Constantly rejected, lost hope in humanity, lost hope in everything, left the world to rot, so he wouldn't have to give up his own power over the worthless masses. Haha. Well.]

I'm going to be honest with you, Shadow, Terry. I was put in a similar position once, and I hesitated before making my answer. There's a very big part of me that thinks that people are fundamentally evil and this world is not worth saving. So if you want someone to tell you about how the world is a beautiful place full of good experiences, look elsewhere, because I don't think it is.

But there are a few select individuals who are worth it. They deserve better than a ruined husk of a world. You know that, and that's why we're all still alive. But I guess that if the Shadow is here keeping us alive, you might have lost that knowledge.

And you deserve better than to hide the rest of your life from your own memories. Trying to run is useless, anyway; somehow, someday, years down the line, they'll crop up again out of the dark and you'll just have to relive the pain just like it happened yesterday, because you never learned how to cope. You never learned how to move on. It'll just keep coming back, forever.

The only way to make it stop is to face it head-on.

[Even this, part of him thinks, is more than Terry deserves. The other part of him wishes he was better at positivity so he could actually make Terry feel better without Sasuke here.]

[overstrain]

[ The Shadow listens while occasionally shifting his weight between his feet as he stands. What Akira says aligns with what he heard so far, so that's at least two people who think along similar lines. ]

So I guess you don't really hate him after all, if you're willing to say all that to him.

[ Shadow Terry will remember that. ]

He heard it all. I agree with it. It's too bad he doesn't want to deal with it anymore.

[infiltrationtools]

...I don't know if I hate him.

[One hand runs into Akira's hair.]

I hate what he's done and I hate what he's doing.

And if he keeps blowing all this off, like he has no responsibility to anyone, because he doesn't care about what he's done and who he's hurt... then yeah, I'll still hate him. Maybe some part of him is pitiable, but some part of him also did terrible things, and he needs to acknowledge that.

I don't want to hate him. If he can get a grip, if he can pull himself back, then that's obviously the best outcome. ...But I don't know if that's going to happen.

[overstrain]

I'd say it's the opposite. His responsibility was too big and he cared too much. He already acknowledges that he's done shitty things, which is why he doesn't want to deal with it anymore because it's crushing him.

[ He sighs, though it's not at Akira. It's at Terry. It's always at Terry. ]

Anyway, I don't know if it'll happen either. It's up to him, after all. I'm just here to enforce his time-out status.

[infiltrationtools]

But if you're not dealing with it, you're not acknowledging it, not really.

You're just letting it sit there and making it everyone else's problem.

[Even this Shadow takeover thing, Akira could easily see it turning into another wave of "I don't have to face the the world because my Shadow will do it for me".]

[overstrain]

Dealing with things and acknowledging things are pretty different. You can acknowledge something without dealing with it, like... say there's a building on fire. You accept the fact that it's on fire, but you're not gonna do anything about it.

[ The mind is complicated, but the Shadow isn't seeking for Akira's forgiveness or getting him to view Terry in a positive light. It's effort he doesn't care for. ]

Want to say anything else to him before I go find the next person?

[infiltrationtools]

Sure, but most of the time there's nothing you can do about a building on fire.

There is something you can do about making amends to people you've hurt.

[Apart from that, though, he feels like everything he can say has been said, so he just shakes his head.]

That's all.

Hope he figures it out.

[overstrain]

[ That's not the point, Akira! Either way, it looks like Shadow Terry won't fight him on that analogy. ]

Have fun on your errand ✰

[ Shadow Terry gives a lazy wave and resumes walking with his cold lemonade before continuing to have on the usual blank face.

bye akinyan... ]

[infiltrationtools]

[See ya.]

[There's a reason he needs people around for Shadow negotiations.]